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Published by Professor von Explaino

I watched as the change representative opened the first of the seven seals. Then I saw one of the four living approvers mail in a text like thunder “System Architecture!” I looked, and there before me was a blank page! Its author held a red pen, and he was given a stamp, and he rode out like an madman bent on correction.

When the change representative opened the second seal, I saw the second living creature write “Security!” Then another page came out, a firey red one. Its author was given the power to protect data on earth and make systems kill each other. To him was given a tiny budget.

When the change representative opened the third seal, I saw the third living creature write “Legals!” I looked and there before me was a strange page! Its author was holding a set of laws in its hand. Then I heard what sounded like a voice among the four living creatures, saying “QITC, Privacy, GDPR, Legislation, and do not damage our liability!”

When the change representative opened the fourth seal, I saw the writing of the fourth living creature say, “Present to the Board!” I looked, and there before me was a pale attachment. Its author was named Governance, and delay was following close behind him. They were given power over a fourth of the applications to slow by process, review, standards, and by the wild whims of the management.

When he opened the fifth seal, I saw in the meeting minutes the souls of the applications that had been slain because of the word of the Approval Board and the testimony they had maintained. They called out in a loud voice “How long, chair, until you judge the avoiders of process and avenge our delays?” Then each of them were given a latte and told to wait a little longer, until the full number of their applications were delayed just as they had been.

I watched as he opened the sixth seal. There was discovered a great vulnerability. The internet turned dark like an unpowered monitor made of Vantablack, the whole NAGIOS monitor screen turned red, and the IP addresses fell to earth as packets drop from the NBN under a light breeze. The management retreated to a remote location, and all hardware and software were removed from its place.

Then the managers of teams, the directors, the board members, the staff, and everyone else, hid in their offices and among the discarded cups in the break room. They called to the service desk “Fall on us and hide us from the clients who we’ve failed to serve! For the great day of their wrath has come, and who can withstand it?”

Published by Professor von Explaino

The GURPS character generator code has had an entweakening, using some new lessons learned. It also has, after demand, a PDF output! Please feel free to toy, test and tell me what I’ve done wrong.

It can even be related to the character generator.

With apologies to all artists behind Send in the Clowns. A 10-minute-to-write parody.

We will get rich
Us as a pair
You with your clever idea
Me with thin-air
Host in the cloud…

Isn’t it bliss?
One click “approve”
No need to read the T&Cs
Just up and move
Into the cloud
Host in the cloud

Now that you’ve stopped, needing servers
Your bottom line will be bursting your doors
Making cash hand over fist without server upkeep
No business plans,
Competitors weep

Uptime’s five nines
(Not a guarantee)
Hiring imag’nry PCs
With real money
Host in the cloud
We’re all in the cloud
Your credit card’s here…

Well I got rich,
Not you I fear,
Never mind let’s try again
Your new idea…
Host in my cloud
Cash in the cloud
No? Maybe next year…

Published by Professor von Explaino

I’ve uploaded my Jageriser for people to play with. To use it, download Jagerise.zip and then:

1. Unpack the zip file. Inspect the code to assure yourself I’m doing nothing untoward (it’s good practice for any extension given to you in this manner).
2. Visit chrome://extensions in your Chrome browser.
3. Click “Load unpacked extension…”
4. Select this directory and click OK.
5. Voila! The extension is in place. Click the [j] icon to Jagerise a page.
Feedback please!

Published by Professor von Explaino

So glad I’ve got time for dumb fun again.

Recoding the Site Jageriser so instead of it being a PHP script (that chews up my bandwidth something fierce) it’s a Chrome plugin. Partway done. So far, I’ve highly amused myself.

Published by Professor von Explaino

As part of the upgrade, I played a bit with simple Javascript/ CSS animations for the Deck of Many Things for D&D. Let me know if you like it?

Published by Professor von Explaino

The book I’m writing has advise in it for a coder. While I was writing it I found little bits of thought that I hadn’t put into practice. So I put them into practice. I’ve just updated my site from the ground up. Let me know if anything’s busted.